Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
