I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Drake has all the answers
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
