I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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