I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
