There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Randomize