I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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