I think i peed on brittanys purse
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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