I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
this hospital has no fireball
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
