then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
