she was so not down for the gang bang
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I would ride that face into the sunset
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
