Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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