Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
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