I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
You're a waste of cheezeits
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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