Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
