i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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