Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
