Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
