how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
