Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Found your dick twin last night
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
