I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I wish they made helmets for livers.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
