just tell him i said nine months
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
