dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize