I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
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