Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Randomize
