summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
