Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
sarcasm needs its own font
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
no more duck duck goose at the bar
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Randomize
