in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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