i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
