i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
There's always time for handjobs
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
