I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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