Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
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