I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
