Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
