haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
