but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize