I just made out with a guy for $7.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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