did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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