Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
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