My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
