I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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