Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
