im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
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