Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
