Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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