hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize