Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
