oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
