I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
