Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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