god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize